The Quitter

I would first like to apologize to all 3 readers out there. I do not know exactly what happened to the writing styles of Caitlin Clark on the blog. I am able to guess most of her typing energy has been transferred from the blog over to other more trivial things, such as graduate study papers, and texting with friends. Thankfully for all of you I can still find time with my open and simple schedule from work.

Because my schedule at work is so simple and the demands of me are not overwhelming in any way. I have been granted 4 days of leave over the Christmas and New Year holiday season. It may seem soon to many of you out there for planning, but there was external pressure motivating me to figure out my itinerary. All in one day I have requested time off, was granted that time off, and then booked a round trip flight from the cities.

I am excited about the return home, but there was a lot of conflict in my means of transportation. Throughout my history I have always been willing to make life as uncomfortable as possible to safe a dollar or two. From eating sandwiches three meals a day to driving my motorcycle until it is well below freezing, I save money where I can. With a little research into my possible flights I began to feel a little ill imagining the amount of money required for a trip home. There were too many variables, should I arrive in La Crosse or Minneapolis, if Minneapolis how will I get home, and then what days should I come home? All thoughts along with 12 web pages began to disorient me a little, and then to complicate matters more I decided to sample alternatives.

A train ride would take 40 hours but save me about $100. Words of discouragement coming from the usual source caused me to quickly disregard the option in fear of being trapped on a rail out near Glacier National Park for my vacation was not too appealing. Another alternative quickly gave rise in my mind. The bus of course. It is scheduled to take approximately the same amount of time but even cost much less than the train. What a wonderful idea.

Well revolutionary ideas sour very quick once realistic thoughts slowly emerge through the ecstatic haze of self believed genius. It was the challenge of making the bus in the first place. I work the Thursday before until 4 and I would need to make it down town Portland in exactly one hour to catch the 5 pm departure time. I imagined a timely exit from work at 3:55 in order to catch the train 4 blocks away for downtown. Arriving in hopefully 35 minutes I could easily march the last 6 blocks and then in 43 hrs I would be in Winona Minnesota.

Eventually sad thoughts of failure helped me realize that I am a coward. So many what ifs forced made me think the convenience of a 4 hr flight beats the rush and uncertainty of bus travel. Darn my poor rationality! Now bills will run me over during Christmas and I will cry on my flight home knowing that I could have done better. All I needed to do was suck up a 43 hour bus ride where I would have probably got some sort of infection on my body, lose a lot of sleep, and most likely listen to the life theories of some random bus passenger next to me. How bad could it have been? I guess I will never know because my sense of adventure and sheer determination has withered away. My 23 year old rationale has accepted the luxuries and conveniences offered in today's society. I think I have mentally beaten myself into deciding next time I will ride the bus or take the train. I look forward to it.